Strange women frighten me. That's right. I said it. They don't frighten me in a Godzilla is coming, run as fast as you can sort of way, but they frighten me enough that I spent 4 hours at a packed club last night and only managed to approach 1 woman... who, as a friend of a friend, was minimally strange and who, technically speaking, I probably can't take credit for approaching.
I spent the other 3 hours and 55 minutes at the club last night thinking about why I have such hard time approaching women. Ironically, I consider myself a pretty outgoing guy and I know I'm a great conversationalist. I've worked more than just a few years in retail sales and don't usually have a hard time approaching strangers. Away from the club or bar scene, in fact, you'll frequently find me smiling at strangers, stopping to say hi, or starting a conversation with a witty comment. I would guess that it was the sexually charged atmosphere of the bar/club scene that makes me nervous, but I used to attend house parties damn near every week and never had a hard time approaching, talking to or freakin with the pseudo-strangers I'd meet at those. Admittedly, random club girl #227 is definitely more foreign than random party girl #5, but my mental block is nowhere near proportionate to the degrees of separation I have from the women that I'm (theoretically) talking to. Or maybe it is.
I can't quite figure this one out. I thought writing my thoughts down would help... it hasn't. My friends last night told me that I was putting too much thought into the situation. I responded by telling them that I was a thinker, that's what I do, and as soon as I wrapped my skull around this, I'd be set... 12 hours later, it doesn't make any more sense than it did when I ordered that first drink and I've only got 12 hours until my next obligatory face-saving attempt of a club trip. So, completely on my own, with no encouragement from others, I've decided that I've been over thinking the situation. I still haven't figured it out, but hopefully at some point in the next 12 hours I'll convince myself not to care, not to worry so much about understanding and to just follow my instincts. Hopefully this approach will stop me from blogging about this again tomorrow, only time (and perhaps tomorrow's blog) will tell...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
I learned an interesting technique for dealing with stuff like this today. It helped me decide to get out and look for a job, and it's pretty much applicable to any situation. You basically ask yourself the following questions about what you are feeling anxiety over.
1) What is the worst that can happen?
2) What's the best that can happen?
3) What is most likely to happen?
4) Even if the worst happens, what could I do to cope?
5) What are some steps I could take to influence the situation?
I know this might seem like common sense, but it really helped to reduce some of my fear about getting out and making some changes in my life.
Talk to you soon! <3 Desiree
Post a Comment